Behold, I Am Vile

Behold, I am vile; what shall I answer thee? I will lay mine hand upon my mouth. Job 40:4.
Every act of transgression, every neglect or rejection of the grace of Christ, is reacting upon yourself; it is hardening the heart, depraving the will, benumbing the understanding, and not only making you less inclined to yield, but less capable of yielding, to the tender pleading of God’s Holy Spirit.
Many are quieting a troubled conscience with the thought that they can change a course of evil when they choose; that they can trifle with the invitations of mercy, and yet be again and again impressed. They think that after doing despite to the Spirit of grace, after casting their influence on the side of Satan, in a moment of terrible extremity they can change their course. But this is not so easily done. The experience, the education, of a lifetime, has so thoroughly molded the character that few then desire to receive the image of Jesus.
Even one wrong trait of character, one sinful desire, persistently cherished will eventually neutralize all the power of the gospel. Every sinful indulgence strengthens the soul’s aversion to God. The man who manifests an infidel hardihood, or a stolid indifference to divine truth, is but reaping the harvest of that which he has himself sown.—Steps to Christ, 34.
It is difficult for us to understand ourselves, to have a correct knowledge of our own characters. The Word of God is plain; but often there is an error in applying it to one’s self. There is liability to self-deception, and to think its warnings and reproofs do not mean me…. Self-love and confidence may give us assurance that we are right, when we are far from meeting the requirements of God’s Word.—Testimonies for the Church 5:332.
With God at Dawn p.218
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Prayer Requests
—-Please pray for my friend’s sister-in-law, Roslyn, who was in a bad car accident. She has a broken neck and several broken ribs. Wanangwa
—-Please pray for Peach. She’s was induced on Monday. Prayers that the baby will be healthy. . . .Her baby is confirmed to be missing the corpus callosum, which is a bundle of nerves that connects the right side of the brain with the left side. Some people are born with this issue and are perfectly fine, others have severe mental handicaps. They won’t know until after the birth which way it will be, as it’s a 50/50 chance either way. Prayers for her family as they adjust to the new baby in the coming days. Jennifer
—-I would like to ask for many prayers for a very dear friend who has Covid Pneumonia and she is suffering tremendously bad!!! She can’t do anything at the moment due to the weakness in her body! She would truly appreciate any and all prayers! Trudie
—-Can I ask prayers for my fever and body pain. This has downed me for three days now. Very painful. Sally
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Dear Friends,
When we lived in Washington State, I had the opportunity to spend the weekend at Camp Mivoden for a Vacation Bible School workshop. A friend had been asked to teach the music to the delegates who had come from the various churches to learn how to better conduct Vacation Bible Schools. She asked me to play the piano for her. I was thrilled at the prospect of spending the weekend at such a beautiful place.
Finally, the looked-forward-to day was here. Ron and the children drove me to Idaho , where Camp Mivoden is located. After we arrived, we spent some time walking around the grounds and enjoying the beauty of the place. When it was time for them to leave me there, Esther Marie, who was about seven at the time, clung to me, sobbing. She had known that she would have to leave me there for the weekend, but when the moment came, she could not bear it. I felt so sorry for her as I felt her little arms and legs wrapped tightly around my body.
We tried to console her by telling her that I would be back on Sunday night, but still the tears flowed freely. Suddenly, I wished that I had not told my friend that I would help her, but there was nothing I could do about it then. I was committed to fulfill my obligation. Finally, we were able to pry Esther off from me, and Ron carried the crying child to the car. The last thing I saw as they were driving away was her outstretched arms and tearful face.
Just as Esther was grieved because we would be separated for a weekend, so our Loving Father in Heaven grieves when we separate ourselves from Him. How He longs to hold us back with His Nail-scarred Hands from the fleeting pleasures of this world. With tears, He cries, “How can I give you up?” (Hosea 11:8) How often His Great Heart of Love yearns over us, longing for us to come back to His Welcoming Arms. As He said to Israel of old, so He says to us today, “For thus saith the Lord GOD, the Holy One of Israel; In returning and rest shall ye be saved; in quietness and in confidence shall be your strength: and ye would not.” Isa 30:15 “And ye would not:” what sorrowful words. How lonely our Great Creator is for our companionship and love. He pleads with us, “As I live, saith the Lord, I have no pleasure in the death of the wicked; but that the wicked turn from his way and live: turn ye, turn ye from your evil ways; for why will ye die?” Eze 33:11 “Return unto me, and I will return unto you, saith the LORD of hosts.” Mal 3:7 “I will heal [your] backsliding, I will love [you] freely.” Hosea 14:4 “And I will restore to you the years that the locust hath eaten, the cankerworm, and the caterpillar, and the palmerworm, my great army which I sent among you. And ye shall eat in plenty, and be satisfied, and praise the name of the LORD your God, that hath dealt wondrously with you: and my people shall never be ashamed.” Joel 2:25,26
Think of it! Our Great Creator longs to have closer fellowship with us than a loving mother has with her well-beloved child. He assures us, “Can a woman forget her sucking child, that she should not have compassion on the son of her womb? yea, they may forget, yet will I not forget thee. Behold, I have graven thee upon the palms of my hands; thy walls are continually before me.” Isa 49:15,16 Our Dear Saviour pleads, “Behold, I stand at the door, and knock: if any man hear my voice, and open the door, I will come in to him, and will sup with him, and he with me.” Rev 3:20 “For thus saith the high and lofty One that inhabiteth eternity, whose name is Holy; I dwell in the high and holy place, with him also that is of a contrite and humble spirit, to revive the spirit of the humble, and to revive the heart of the contrite ones.” Isa 57:15-17 What a wonderful God!
May we daily open our heart’s door and invite the Dear Saviour in, that He may take complete control of our life. May we cling to our Loving Saviour just as tightly as Esther clung to me, when we were going to be separated for a few days. May we, throughout our life, walk in the assurance of His matchless love and grace.