- We have all been taught that faith is a gift from God. Due to our fallen nature, God must offer “prevenient grace” first, to enable our response of faith. What about love? Do you think of it as a similar theological virtue that cannot be exercised by natural human effort alone? Why or why not? Would you apply this answer to all types of “love,” or just some?
- In the Teacher’s Notes, our author reviews the four loves: Storge (affection through familiarity or family), eros (romantic love), philia (friendship), and agape (sacrificial or selfless love). How is it helpful to the spiritual life to understand how distinct these are? How is it helpful to the spiritual life to understand them as interconnected creations of God?
- In John 13:35 Jesus says, “By this everyone will know that you are my disciples; if you love one another.” Think about a mature Christian you have known. What did you witness that was extraordinary loving about that person? What is one of the greatest single examples of agape love that you have ever witnessed?
- Some Christians say: “Love is not a feeling. It’s a decision.” Does that mean that exercising agape doesn’t feel good? Does it mean I am still loving if I feel contempt for someone at work, but speak in a friendly manner to them? Could I exercise eternal love solely as an intellectual decision to obey God, with no feelings attached?
- Our author wisely gives us a nuanced description of the role of feelings in love on Sunday and Monday, writing that “(Love) is a total commitment of our actions, feelings, and thoughts towards Christ and our neighbors;” and, “Paul uses a series of verbs. For him, love is more about our actions than about feelings or emotions.” In this view, love is more than feelings, but feelings have a role to play in agape. How would you describe that role? How can we shepherd, or “totally commit” our feelings to Christ and our neighbors, as well as our actions?
- An experimental study found that when people were assigned a “fun” activity and then a “meaningful” activity, the participants found that the pleasure of the “fun” activity wore off quickly, while the rewards of the “meaningful” activity lasted (Diener & Biswas-Diener, 2008). Can you think of similar examples in your own life experiences? How does that fit with the idea of different meanings of the word “pleasure” the same way we have different meanings of the word “love?”
- Do you believe God experiences feelings of love? Explain.
- One of the hallmarks of God’s agape love for us is that, unlike human friendship or sexual attraction, there’s nothing meritorious about “us” that can be said to cause the “draw” of this Partner to the relationship. How does that make it difficult for some people to accept a relationship with God?
