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Old Dogs Do Learn

September 1, 2015 By admin

Photo: Mark Barner

I wasn’t a very strict Mom. I had my rules, but if my kids played their cards right, they could often find a way around me.

I got so tired of asking my son to make his bed that I got him a sleeping bag. Somehow that didn’t seem as disorderly when it wasn’t made up. He also got out of having to take piano lessons – I couldn’t stand his whining.

I used to threaten my children that if they left their lunch or homework at home one more day that they would have to go without, but I always ended up bailing them out by delivering their books or lunch to school. And if they ran out of allowance, I was always good for a loan.

But on the topic of college, I was a rock. If it took them 10 years, they were going to finish. One of my daughter’s boyfriends described me as an over-achiever and he was probably right. I always felt like I had something to prove and blamed a lot of my insecurity on not finishing college.

At the time I was offered a M.R.S. in place of a B.S., I was thrilled. I hated school and was pretty awful at it. I think when I finished my third year at Columbia Union College, I may have had a whopping 2.0 grade point average. High school hadn’t been much better. Throughout the years since 1968, I had thought about finishing and had even taken a few college classes along the way. I loved the process of finding out more about a subject and actually retaining some of what I learned, but I didn’t finish my degree.

Then about three years ago, I got a bulk e-mail about online degrees and decided to give it a try. I found a college that would offer me something other than business and computers, a caring adviser helped get me a student loan(s), discovered I had enough credits to begin my junior year – and I was off. And I can’t describe how fantastic it felt.

My classwork consisted of a college course begun and completed every six weeks. I was considered a full-time student, all the while holding down a full-time job and taking some freelance writing jobs along the way, plus authoring a devotional with my daughter for 2006. It hasn’t been easy, but in one month, I graduate with a B.S. in Interdisciplinary Studies with an emphasis in English and Psychology and a GPA of 3.7. Its been expensive, time consuming and at times exhausting. Would I do it again? You bet. My sense of accomplishment is at an all-time high.

Still Growing

Now that I’ve proved I can learn, have my insecurities vanished? Mostly yes, but that had nothing to do with GPA or degrees or the amount of my student loans, it had to do with coming to terms with what makes me worth anything. It’s God’s love and it’s always been there waiting for me to recognize its power. The following verse, with some added personalization, sums it up for me, and it didn’t take a college degree to understand it. “Nothing can ever separate me from His love. Death can’t, and life can’t. The angels can’t, and the demons can’t. My fears for today, my worries about tomorrow, and even the powers of hell can’t keep God’s love away. Whether I am high above the sky or in the deepest ocean, nothing in all creation will ever be able to separate me from the love of God that is revealed in Christ Jesus my Lord” (Romans 8:38).

So, don’t give up on your dreams. Fulfilling them can give you a lot of pleasure and don’t worry about being too old to start. At 58, I figure I’ll die before I pay off my student loans. So keep achieving, but do it because it pleases you. And if it pleases you, you know that the One who will never let you be separated from His love will also be pleased.

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Read more at the source: Old Dogs Do Learn

Article excerpt posted on en.intercer.net from Family First.

Over the Fence

August 29, 2015 By admin

Photo: Jeremy Menking

I grew up on a farm in north‑central Minnesota in a community where we got along very well with the neighbors. That is, with one exception. Our back pasture bordered the property of a neighbor I’ll call Alfred.

We had pretty good fences, but even the best fences can have some weaknesses if livestock have a notion that the grass is greener on the other side. Alfred had a field of ripening corn that some of our cattle must have felt it was just something too tempting to pass up. At any rate, our cattle got across that fence. To say they made a feast of the neighbor’s corn field would be an understatement.

It took us a while, but with the help of some other neighbors, we got the cows back on our side of the fence.

“This is going to cost you, Joe,” Alfred told my father in no uncertain terms. “Your cows did a lot of damage to my corn.”

“How much do we owe you?” my father asked.

“I haven’t figured it out yet. When I do, I’ll send you a bill.

My father nodded. I was at a loss for words. But I wasn’t when we got the bill. “No way!” I told my father. “He’s charging way too much for his corn!

My father shrugged, “What choice do we have? Take it to court? That’s not a good idea between neighbors.

The following year was very dry. On Alfred’s land there were no ponds; he watered his cattle from a well. We had a well for the cattle, too, but we also had several ponds on our land. The soil surrounding the ponds had moisture so that grass could grow.

One late-summer morning, Alfred’s cows suddenly seemed to think that the grass was lot greener on our side of the fence. Alfred’s cows were in our pasture; on our side of the fence. At first I was upset. But then I thought, Ah, the shoe is on the other foot now.

Sharing Pastures

“What do I owe you?” Alfred asked sheepishly. My father waved him off, “We’ll talk about that later. First, let’s get these cows back across.

When we got back to our house, I anxiously asked my father what he was going to charge Alfred for this little incident.

My father answered, “Why, we’re not going to charge him a penny.”

I gasped, “You must be joking, Dad!”

“Look,” he said, “all they did was eat a little bit of hay.

“But he charged a lot for the damage to his corn last year!” I protested.

“That’s in the past,” my father said. “I know Alfred doesn’t have much money. In fact, I have an idea that will prevent something like this from ever happening again.”

His reasoning was this: We would share pastures. “It’s always a good idea to rotate pastures if you can,” he said. “Early in the summer, before it gets too dry, we can run the cattle on Alfred’s land. When it gets dry, the cows can come into our pasture with the ponds.” After talking it over with Alfred, we put a gate between our properties.

Soon I recognized the wisdom of my father’s thinking. Fences are necessary on a farm. They separate what needs to be kept apart. But gates connect—both pastures and people.

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Cheap Vacations

August 29, 2015 By admin

Photo: Studiomill

Does your family desperately need a vacation? Is your bank account squeaking? You don’t need a key to Fort Knox to enjoy time with your loved ones. While many “all-inclusive” vacations can run into thousands of dollars, options that are big on family fun and easy on the pocketbook exist as well. Here are a number of ways to save money on your next family trip:

Do your homework. If you’re planning a vacation, make sure that you know where you are going, how you’re going to get there, and your itinerary along the vacation route. Forethought can help you stay on budget.
Look for the deals. The Internet is jam-packed with travel sites that offer low prices, incredible deals, and family-friendly fares on everything from hotels to restaurants, and airfare if needed.
Choose alternative accommodations on portions of your trip. Broaden your horizons, squeeze your spending, and have a great time by staying overnight in a tent or bunking at a hostel. (For more information about hostels, go to www.hostels.com). These low-priced alternatives can save your family plenty and help create great memories!
Eat on the cheap. With proper planning, you can enjoy great food along the way at a fraction of normal vacation cuisine cost. Decide ahead of time to keep convenience store purchases to a minimum, and buy plenty of fresh fruits like apples, bananas and oranges at grocery stores along the way. If you plan to eat in a restaurant, choose a time when menu prices are less expensive (breakfast and lunch) and eat light during the dinner hour. If each traveler has a water bottle, choose to purchase your water by the gallon and refill them. Buying new individual bottled waters can really add up.
Go on a series of day trips. Wherever you happen to live, there is a good chance that you are within driving distance of an enjoyable family outing. Museums and national parks are inexpensive and in abundance. Your family can enjoy all the amenities that delight tourists visiting the same area, and best of all, you get to sleep in your own bed. For more information on attractions near you, check out www.fodors.com and have a peek at a well-researched guidebook for your area.

Remember, the journey is just as important as the destination. Quality time with family is what memories are made of…no matter where you go. Seek togetherness, and you’ll discover a world of possibilities!

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Read more at the source: Cheap Vacations

Article excerpt posted on en.intercer.net from Family First.

Our Last Argument

August 29, 2015 By admin

Photo: iStock

Not long after we were wed, my wife, Sue, and I had a terrible fight. Providentially, what could have destroyed our marriage ended up strengthening it.

Sue and I were getting ready to attend a church party that we had been looking forward to for some time. I drew the water for my bath and then stepped into our bedroom to get some clean clothing. While I was gone, my pretty little wife decided she would play a joke on me. She slipped into the bathroom, locked the door, and took a bath in the water I had drawn.

When Sue had finished bathing, she went into the bedroom to dress, and I headed to the bathroom to take my bath. Much to my surprise, I discovered that Sue had not drained the water she had bathed in. I suggested to her that, since she had taken a bath in my water, she should drain it and draw me some fresh water. Sue was in a playful mood. She giggled and said, “Oh, I wasn’t very dirty. Just take a bath in my water.”

I saw no humor in her remark and responded in a gruff, demanding voice, “No way. Now get yourself in here and draw me some fresh bath water.”

Sue flashed her prettiest smile and teased me. “I really wasn’t very dirty. Go ahead and use my water.”

Without really meaning to threaten her, I said, “If you don’t get yourself in here and draw me some fresh bath water, I’ll throw you in the tub, clothes and all.”

Sue’s smile faded, and she said, “You wouldn’t dare do that to me . . . would you?”

Sensing that I was being challenged, I responded by restating what now really did become a threat, “If you don’t draw me some fresh bath water, I will. I’ll throw you in, clothes and all!”

Shocked, Sue said, her voice rising, “You wouldn’t dare do that!”

“I’m not kidding!” I shouted as I headed toward her, picked her up, and carried her into the bathroom.

As I held Sue over the tub, I thought to myself, “I love this dear lady, and I really don’t want to drop her in this water.” Looking for a way out without damaging my pride, once again I asked her if she would draw me some fresh bath water.

Out of Control

She looked me in the eye and said, in what seemed to me a defiant tone, “No way!”

So I did a very foolish thing. I dropped her, clothes and all, into the tub.

Sue came up wet and angry.

Then I said some things I shouldn’t have said, and Sue withdrew. She didn’t speak to me for four days. And she didn’t do any cooking or cleaning. My selfishness and bad temper almost cost me my marriage!

This incident happened more than 35 years ago. It was our last fight. We chose not to argue again.

Don’t misunderstand. Our opinions differ at times, but we don’t fight about them. We’ve learned a better way. We’ve learned to allow some give and take, to be considerate, patient, loving, kind, and gentle with each other. We’ve also learned to compromise. We love each other so much that we don’t want to hurt each other. So we discipline ourselves to do and say only those things that will build up the other’s self-esteem.

We have learned that spouses can avoid fights by:

1. loving enough to sacrifice for each other
2. learning to discuss differences calmly. (Don’t shout!)
3. learning to compromise.
4. learning to be unselfish. (You don’t always have to be right or to have your own way.)
5. asking God for His help. (We asked, and He helped.)

Thirty-five years without an argument or fight. It’s a great way to live!

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Read more at the source: Our Last Argument

Article excerpt posted on en.intercer.net from Family First.

Camping Together

August 25, 2015 By admin

Photo: Ben C Beuford

Camping is an inexpensive way to vacation with your family, if you remember to keep your focus on the purpose.

I’m cold. It’s 2:00 a.m. I’m supposed to be asleep, but the blow-up mattress underneath me has lost some of its “blow-up.” My wife is huddled in a ball trying to keep warm. Squinting through the darkness I notice in our tent my other children sleeping quietly. I recall their optimism, “Daddy, camping in April will be so much fun! There will be hardly anyone at the campground and…” And it will be cold.

After crawling out from under my sleeping bag, I don a few clothes and step outside for a moment. I stop awestruck. The star-studded sky brilliantly twinkles like a billion Christmas lights overhead. A raccoon darts across the grounds. A few coals still glow silently in the fire pit.

When I slip back into our tent, I search for a few extra jackets to lay over my sleeping cherubs to make sure they stay warm. Children look so innocent when they are asleep. What are they dreaming about? Hiking around the lake? Catching frogs and turtles? Collecting pinecones? Fishing off the dock? Eating a steaming bowl of oatmeal in the cool morning sunshine at the picnic table?

Investing In Memories

I pull on a sweatshirt, toss a coat over my sleeping wife and crawl back into my sleeping bag. As I lay there, I think to myself, “Why am I so slow to learn?”

Earlier in the week I remember thinking, “Camping? In a tent? Those days are gone. I want a motor home! Besides, the kids won’t have much fun. It will probably rain or be cold.” But the excitement and thrill of surviving seemed to create a joy all by itself!

A teacher in college once told me as I sat on his old living room couch, “We’ve decided to invest in memories instead of things.” How true it is! My children don’t want my “things,” they want me. Just being together in our hectic society is a miracle for many families to accomplish.

No, camping isn’t always fun. There are still bee stings and burnt hot dogs. Sometimes it does rain. But who does it bother the most? (Me.) My kids don’t seem to mind as much as I do. They are happily sleeping on the other side of our Wal-Mart “on-sale” tent.

I give the mattress a few puffs of air to keep us from hitting bottom and then wander into dreamland myself thinking, “It takes so little to be happy.”

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Read more at the source: Camping Together

Article excerpt posted on en.intercer.net from Family First.

Old Dogs Do Learn

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Over the Fence

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Cheap Vacations

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Our Last Argument

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Camping Together

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