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A New State of Mind

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As each new year approaches, four cliché words consistently resurface in my mind: “New Year, New Me.” I must admit, thinking about a new year with a clean slate is exciting! I have the opportunity to start new hobbies, take on extra responsibilities, and reinvent myself. A new year also presents each of us the time to recover from the challenges that were thrown at us. 

This past year was one of the most difficult years I’ve ever experienced. I became newly engaged while trying to complete the last of my requirements before obtaining my degree. Between a graduation portfolio, full-time classes, two jobs, and a long distance relationship, my schedule left me with little time to study. I was surviving on coffee, small paychecks, and short frantic prayers. Everything felt so close, yet too far to grasp. I remember lying in bed at night with the overwhelming pressure weighing me down as I desperately prayed for the motivation to wake up the next morning just to do it all over again.

December eventually arrived and my senior year finally came to a close. I graduated with a BA in English, and immediately the pressure and anxiety melted away! All the last minute assignments and torturous late nights were over. I was sure that once I left college, life would be easy. Who was I kidding? In just one month, I’d graduated from college, gotten married, moved to Indiana, and am now trying to secure a new job in my new location. “Easy” isn’t exactly the word I’d use anymore. Now that it’s a new year, I’m finding it less exciting and more challenging to start fresh. I’ve always thought of myself as fairly adaptable, but I’ll admit, I’ve been struggling to adapt to this new stage of life with its unfamiliar obstacles.

We all have new stages we’re experiencing. Maybe for some of you it’s not graduating college. Maybe you are newly married, have added a new member to your family, or are exploring a different career path. Whatever the stage, it can be worrisome to start in unfamiliar territory. We’re creatures of habit – comfortable with our daily lives and repetitive schedules. Although a new start to the year is exciting, it’s for sure without its challenges and concerns. Joshua 1:9 says this, “Remember that I have commanded you to be determined and confident! Do not be afraid or discouraged, for I, the Lᴏʀᴅ your God, am with you wherever you go.” This particular verse is encouraging because I’ve experienced a lot of change, but despite these frightening changes, Christ remains the same.

Life will never be easy and we’ll always be entering a different stage, but we’re not alone. In this new year, I challenge each of you to take your unfamiliar experiences and instead of feeling anxious, choose to learn from them. Remain open to new changes with a positive attitude and allow God to turn them into growth! 

Madeleine Temple writes Indiana.

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Article excerpt posted on en.intercer.net from Answers for Me.

It’s Time for Bed!

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“Parents should live more for their children, and less for society. Study health subjects, and put your knowledge to a practical use. Teach your children to reason from cause to effect. Teach them that if they desire health and happiness, they must obey the laws of nature.” Ministry of Healing, pg. 386.

Jean shared with me how she hated to hear her mother saying, “It’s time for bed.”

“It can’t be time for bed. It’s still light outside. I’m busy playing. The other kids are playing. Listen to them! I can’t possibly go to sleep with all that racket,” Jean would respond. But her mom didn’t look and she didn’t listen either. It was summer in Minnesota! Jean had gone to bed early all winter and she didn’t care. Jean says, “I knew that my mom was wrong, wrong, wrong!”

According to Jean, “It happened again when I was a teenager. She would say, ‘It’s time for bed.’ And I’d say, ‘It can’t be! I’m not done with my homework. I promised to call my friend. Anyway, I’m not tired!’ Again, she didn’t listen and I knew that I was not tired. I knew that she was wrong, wrong, wrong!”

But Jean admits today that actually it turned out that her mom was right. Recent research shouts the message that sleep is important, not only for the body and brain growth of young children, but for the body health and brain growth for all ages, especially teens.

In her book, Sleepless in America, Mary Sheedy Kureinka has gathered together research studies that combine a clear picture of the importance of enough sleep for children and the impact lack of sleep has on their behavior.

Consider these findings:

  • Did you know that a high-energy child might have only a 15-minute window when the body is ready for sleep? Miss that and the body becomes wired for a burst of activity that looks as if the child is not tired, but it is actually a call for being asleep earlier.
  • Did you know that teenagers’ body clocks change and they really do get tired later and need to sleep longer in the morning?
  • Did you know that letting teens sleep all day on the weekend exacerbates the problem and they should be awakened by 10:00 a.m.?
  • Did you know that adolescents need 9 ¼ hours of sleep a night? If school starts early, parents really do need to say, “Time for bed” and stick with it. The kids will be healthier and smarter when they get to school.
  • Did you know that missing one hour of sleep eight nights in a row impairs cognitive function as much as going 24 hours without sleep?

So how much is enough? Sleep needs vary from one person to another, but according to Sheedy Kurcinka, here are the current recommendations:

Infants: 14-18 hours in a 24-hour period
Toddlers: (18-36 months) 13 hours (including naps)
Preschoolers: 12 hours (including naps)
School age children: 10 hours
Adolescents: (13-18 years) 9 ¼ hours
Adults: 8 ½ hours

All to often, our busy lives keep us from noticing that the negative behaviors of our children are often the result of poor sleep patterns and the environments we provide for them throughout the day. It’s a balancing act. Sometimes we let children stay up because we haven’t been with them during the day or because we are too exhausted to get them in bed! Sometimes we want them to attend a culturally enriching or educational experience, which requires a later bedtime. And sometimes we just want them to have some fun. However, I invite you to think about the price they and we may pay in not saying, “It’s time for bed!”

Recommended Reading:

Sheedy Kurinka, Mary. Sleepless in America: Is Your Child Misbehaving… or Missing Sleep? 2007. HarperCollins. This book provides ideas to use and includes humorous and real life stories from parents with whom she has worked.

Some information adapted from WE (29:2), 2010.

Susan E. Murray writes from Berrien Springs, MI.

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Article excerpt posted on en.intercer.net from Answers for Me.

Walking the Path

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When I grew up in New York City, we had a big painting hanging on the wall behind the couch. I was intrigued by the scenery because it had a beautiful path wandering through the snow. The path meandered past giant trees and a house, and disappeared into the distance. I would stare at the path and wonder where would it take me if I had strolled through the snow. I would imagine walking and disappearing into the distance right where the path met the horizon. What would I find over the horizon? Where would it take me? I guess that is one reason that I still find photos and artwork with paths intriguing.

Life is like a path that takes us places we never dreamed about or imagined. Sometimes we gaze into the future and try to plan and predict what will happen but we can never see the end of the road. Sometimes, we can’t even see into the next moment. There are too many potholes, cracks in the sidewalk, or pitfalls that might keep us from our final destination.

Once while I was visiting in Washington D.C., I arrived at my hotel after the restaurant closed. I was hungry so I thought I would stop by a nearby drug store for peanuts and a breakfast bar. As I walked quickly through the dark lit streets, I did not see an uneven portion of the sidewalk. Just as I got ready to dart across the street, I tripped and flew out onto the asphalt. Luckily no cars were coming. I was a bit embarrassed as a few people stopped to see if I was okay. I assured them that I was and continued to the drug store. I grabbed a few snacks and other purchases to clean and bandage my wounded knees. That’s right, I skinned both of them rather good.

When we spend time in God’s Word, the messages act as lights to show us the path of life so that we don’t stumble and fall. We learn about the pitfalls of our broken human nature and navigate around them. We discover places that would cause us to stumble in our walk with Christ. And we learn that God gives us strength to go life’s distance.

When we travel through the darkest moments in our lives, we know that we don’t have to fear evil because God tells us in Psalms 23:4 that He is with us. With God’s Word as light, we can navigate the sidewalks of life and avoid falling into situations that hurt or potentially destroy us. He promises us that His Word will guide us through life’s path that will lead us to our final destination: His kingdom.

Pamela A Williams writes from Southern California.

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Article excerpt posted on en.intercer.net from Answers for Me.

Why Go to Church?

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Sometimes I think about church attendance and wonder if I and others come just to hear a good word or song. We look for inspiration so we can keep going in our lives. Most of the time, we find it. After church, we greet friends and face another week until we meet again. Sometimes, I think about those who don’t go to church. I think about the empty seats and wonder why others don’t come.

I decided to ask a few people who don’t come to church. One person said that she was criticized about the way she dressed. She found more acceptance outside of the church but she still seeks to fill that empty spot inside.

Another person told me that what he reads in the Bible and what he sees in churches are two different things. Because of this, he no longer attends church.

I recently read a book about a man who graduated with a degree in theology. The more he read and studied about Jesus, the less he saw evidence of His presence in church. He visited several churches but he could find only a few bright spots of God at work. He decided to become atheist because the evidence of God was not in the church. While I do not agree with his solution, I am challenged to understand why I go to church.

I thought about this and an old metaphor came to mind. The church is like a hospital. In fact, I’ve heard this comparison several times.

Once, the youth at my church performed a play about a hospital. This hospital took the sick that had good insurance but turned away those who did not have insurance. The uninsured sick were outside and the staff did nothing for them. But there was one staff member who fought hard and worked to get medical care for those who needed it.

Suddenly, the stage went dark. Everyone took off their hospital attire and revealed black t-shirts with various church positions: deacons, elders, youth leaders, and so on. The play continued with the one caring hospital staff becoming so frustrated with the hospital that she walked away from the church. On the back of her t-shirt, it said, “lost.”

Sometimes I think that we have church wrong. We come looking to receive a blessing so we can make it through another week only to return to receive another blessing. Rather than coming to get, why not come to give? Why not help others who seek to have a relationship with God? Why not allow God to flow through us with an attitude of giving. If each of us reached out to those around us and allowed God’s blessings to flow through us, church would make a difference in our broken society.

What would this look like? Perhaps we could find someone we don’t know, introduce ourselves and learn if this person if they needed help with anything. If they need help, then help them or help them find someone who can help.

We could find a visitor and pray with them or invite them to eat with us. Perhaps we could reach out to someone new in town and assist if any needs emerge.

Perhaps we could give a hand-written card to someone who lost a family member. Perhaps we can give someone a ride if a ride is needed. Perhaps we can say words of encouragement to the pastor; and yes, pastors need to be encouraged too. I believe a church filled with people like this would be packed.

Although I haven’t mastered this completely, when I go to church, my goal is to reach out to others. I ask God to show me what I need to do… and he does. I’ve met a lot of new folks and try to help if there is a need.

Pamela A. Williams writes from Southern California.

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Article excerpt posted on en.intercer.net from Answers for Me.

The Joy of God

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Imagine waking up to a day where the future is unknown—where the struggle to survive is intense and the odds are against you?

Imagine if your husband, wife, or three year-old child were to became gravely ill and receive a diagnoses that is essentially a death sentence? I once knew a woman who was diagnosed with inoperable Melanoma who was told that she had three to five years to live. Can you imagine receiving such news? Every priority and goal in your life would change.

She has since died, about three years after her diagnosis. I attended her funeral and joined her other friends who tried to bring comfort to her four young adult children.

When David sinned against God, himself and Bathsheba, he suddenly found himself devoid of hope and was overwhelmed with the thought of living a joyless life. How could he live with the future being so dark and foreboding?

Sometimes we underestimate the effect that hope and joy has in our lives until it’s gone.

What would you miss most if you suddenly learned (and it were true) that the story of Jesus was a myth and that he wasn’t coming back to rescue anyone? Would you be overwhelmed with fear? Would you be sad?

The thing that brought hope back into David’s life was the assurance that his sin was forgiven.

“Have mercy on me, O God, because of your unfailing love. Because of your great compassion, blot out the stain of my sins. Wash me clean from my guilt. Purify me from my sin…Oh, give me back my joy again…Restore to me the joy of your salvation, and make me willing to obey you” (Psalm 51:1,2,7,8,12, NLT).

Rich DuBose writes from Northern California.

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Article excerpt posted on en.intercer.net from Answers for Me.

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